It’s okay to take a step back

Dating not only takes up our time, but it also takes up our thoughts. When we are in it, all of us is in it.

Taking a break while dating may seem like a crazy, far-fetched idea, but it isn't. We are people, and people could only take so much before the stress begins to show. We have a commandment: ushmarte me’od nafshasachem- to watch over ourselves with a lot of attention. That applies to many things and could be used here as well. If we feel ourselves starting to strain under the weight that is shidduchim, perhaps it’s time to take a step back.

I’m not saying one must, and you should probably talk to someone first, but I’m saying it’s something to consider.

Everyone has a different threshold, but it's essential to check in with yourself and see how you're faring. You may need to unplug for a bit, or you may not, but at least ask yourself or journal about how you think shidduchim has been going. Every experience is a learning experience, but sometimes we need to push off a lesson for something more important, namely taking care of ourselves.

You owe it to yourself not to push too far past your limit. You are the only one who really knows if you need a break, and it's up to you to provide one for yourself. Think about it, come to a decision, and stick with it.

If you decide you want to keep going, or you choose to take a step back, take care of yourself and validate yourself for your accomplishments and how far you've come!

I wish you much success and clarity!

As an aside, something to keep in mind is the more you chase after something, the more it eludes you.